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About the Burrito

The burrito is a complex creature. An amalgamation of many sub-standard elements that creates something delicious.

The story begins many years ago in a place you have never visited. Unless you have been to Bishkek of present day Kyrgyzstan. And the aforementioned year was 1947. June 9 to be precise. A 10 year old boy named Feliks had just exchanged a Chia Pet he stole on a recent time-travel adventure for a rusty Mosin-Nagant rifle. Feliks’ life was about to take a turn to the wild.

Pony hunting the biggest spectator sport in Bishkek (then known as Frunze within the Soviet Union). Local would purchase a pony and push it out into an open field. They would then find some rubble that made for a comfy seat, crack open the bathtub vodka and wait for the pony to be assassinated. The best pony hunters were heroes in the community. Legends such as Dik Shanei, Vlarlton Veston and Billy Ray Cyrus.

Feliks had dreamed of being a pony hunter for as long as he could remember. He had worked other jobs, but was never content. Whether he was sewing shoes for Nike or piloting spacecraft on the USSR’s secret mission to enslave the population of Jupiter for their fantastic borsch making skills, he longed to murder ponies.

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